Yesterday afternoon I was pretty upset about a few different things and events. I hit a low point in my stay here so far. I didn’t have control over things that were happening (not things here) and I didn’t like the way some stories were playing out. I was pretty down yesterday afternoon. So I let myself be down for about 20 minutes, then I sucked it up and put one foot in front of the other and kept moving. Sometimes that’s the best we can do…just keep moving, even if we don’t know where we’re going or how we’ll get there or why we’re moving at all.
I opened by Bible to Isaiah 41. Sometimes I just open my Bible and see where I land in hopes that God is trying to tell me something specific. Yesterday, He definitely was. Here’s what I opened to yesterday:
“I took you from the ends of the earth. From its farthest corners I called you. I said, ‘You are my servant.’ I have chosen you and have not rejected you. So do not fear, for I am with you. Do not be dismayed, for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you. I will uphold you with my righteous hand.”
My day immediately turned around. We taught our first English class, and I really, really liked doing that. It was the most useful I’ve felt so far. And then Lillian, the house mom most like my mom, invited us to her house for birthday cake for one of the boys. The kids have picked up things just from watching Step Up, and they have some serious talent. They all danced for us and tried to impress us. (I was impressed). We had so much fun and I felt more like part of the family than a liability.
I am still trying to find my place here. The kids are precious and I enjoy being with them. But they are already in a better place than they were. They love everyone who comes down here. I don’t feel like I’m making much of a difference, but I still have 3 weeks. Anyways, it doesn’t matter. I am chosen. And so are you.